Must.Slow.Down

Back on the dilaudid.

I guess I did a little too much activity the other day.  The girls' dresser came in, and I had been smart:  I ordered one that was already assembled.  However, it did come in a rather large box with lots of styrofoam and cardboard.  Since I really have been wanting to work on their room, I spent a good part of Tuesday evening breaking down the box and then putting away some clothes that I have for the girls.

(as a side-note:  they aren't even home yet and they have quite the wardrobe!  It seems like so much, but since I suppose it is for TWO babies, it isn't as much as it seems.  A lot of people have been lending me clothes, and I also bought a few things myself since not all of Zev's clothes were unisex 'enough' for me)

So that took awhile.  And I also had swept/mopped the floor while I was waiting for the dresser to arrive, organized our pyrex food containers, finished the laundry...  yes, a bit too much.  But honestly, I had been feeling bad that Jason was doing everything.  He inadvertently made me feel bad when we were driving home the other day and had asked me if I had finished the laundry (in a mis-communication, he had thought I was going to do it, while I hadn't actually said I would).  When I said I hadn't had the time, he said that excuse was meaningless to him (he himself has zero time).  Since I was already feeling bad, that made me feel even worse, hence the over-activty of the evening.  He had his own shit to do (unpack a completely different dresser for our TV accessories), and I didn't want him to have to do everything.  But lesson learned:  I was in much more surgery-related pain compared to other days, and I didn't want to take ibuprofen or another OTC that may hurt my stomach.  By the evening I was really hurting:  so I took some dilaudid and felt better.  It has worn off now, but I'm going to wait and see how the day progresses.  I'd prefer to only take it at night if I have to.

The girls:  both are now on open-air cribs, but honestly I expect them to go back to the closed crib.  Their temps were low yesterday while I was there:  they may need a little more time in the heat.  One step at a time.  So far the 26 cals continue to be working for them, thank goodness.  Tzelia gained 2 ounces overnight, and Meorah 1.5.  We did a little bf'ing again, and the girls did quite well.  I'm trying not to worry too much about my supply, although I do want to start taking records of how much I am pumping.  I do not think they are getting much from me (we stopped weighing them since it really doesn't matter at this point how much they take), so I shouldn't have to worry too much about the inaccuracy.  But I do want to have a general idea;  I know I have enough for a single baby, but not enough for twins.  After talking to Susan yesterday, I feel a little better knowing that once I am doing more actual breastfeeding, my supply should catch up with them.  Since I am just pumping, my body doesn't know it needs to make enough for twins.  By putting them to the breast, it should signal to my body that: Hey!  Two babies!!  Make more!!  It is a supply and demand thing, after all.

Plans for today:  not too much, actually.  The first day this week I haven't had something other than just visiting the girls on my agenda.  Which is a good thing.  Again, I haven't been doing well.  As I said to Jason the other day:  I would like ONE pain-free day.  I haven't had one in a month now.

Oh, and I did call my old GI doc to make an appointment.  She has an opening in....two months.  Ugh.  So I'm going to email my PCP and see if she can do something for me other than tell me to see a GI doc. Because I can't take 2 months of this GI stuff.  I'd like to be able to actually eat real food and more than just a few bites at a time, ya know?  I've been living on yogurt, cottage cheese, cereal, fruit, and oatmeal for the last week.  Every time I try something more substantial I end up with a stomach ache.  Not good.