Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Another day of rest

Well, I'm spending another day at home.

I was a bit 'off' yesterday.  But I had a fantastic day with Tzelia and Meorah.

In my last post, I mentioned calling in a lactation consultant to check on my latch with Meorah.  I had felt so bad while 'nursing' her:  she would just get so frustrated by her inability to latch that she would cry.  So I would just try to hold her upright against me, and then she would get bad that I took her little nipple-toy away.  No-win.  I was hoping some help would allow us to have a better mommy-daughter bonding experience.

So the first thing I mentioned when I showed up yesterday was if one of the LCs would be available to give me (and my girls) a hand.  Susan came in just in time when I was settling in with Tzelia, and we tried a nipple shield.  I never had to use one with Zev, so it was a new experience.  But dang, did it work for Tzelia.  The shield made it much easier for her to latch, and when we finally ended our together-time, she came away with a pretty definite milk mustache.  I wish I had a camera.

We did the same thing with Meorah, who took a bit longer to 'get' the idea that if you suck on it, you may actually get a treat.  She did manage to figure it out, but then decided she'd rather sleep.  So we spent the rest of the time just rocking and sleeping.  However, Susan was impressed enough to say I could graduate to nutritive feedings, which is a big step up.  So for now on, rather than pump first, I get to see if the girls can actually breastfeed for awhile before they are given the feedings through the NG tube.  They will still need to continue with the feedings:  it is fortified breast milk and they need the extra calories.  But, even breastfeeding for part of a feed (or feeds) is great.

I did learn the girls will need to go home with bottles, since they will continue to need the fortified milk (and/or formula...but I'm going to hope it sticks to only breastmilk).  But that isn't horrible...it will probably make things easier.

Unfortunately I was feeling kind of icky yesterday and by the end of the day knew I was coming down with a cold.  Well, I live with a 2 year old.  He attracts germs.  The poor guy's nose is just a running faucet, and you can't help but get it on you if you come within a ten foot radius.  I feel so bad for him right now:  he's just in a cranky mood, but most people are when they are sick.  Poor thing.  Hopefully he'll feel better in a day or so.  At least it is an improvement from last year when he was sick all time time.

I'm just hoping I am feeling better by tomorrow.  Since I have a cold, I cannot go near the girls.  I did have to go to the hospital since I was out of bottles for pumping and I wanted to drop off some laundry and milk.  But I couldn't go into their room.  Which made me cry, which made their nurse cry.  Of course she encouraged me to call if I wanted to, and she did say how great they were doing.  I knew they would be...I was just looking forward to doing some more bonding.

So I've mainly spent the day at home.  Most of it at the pump.  But that seems to be my life right now...


  1. Consider it rest! It may be forced, but take it anyway, you are going to need it. I hope everyone feels better soon!

    Yesterday you wrote about your guilt of being pulled between the kids, each of them will need you more than the others at some point, you can't feel guilty about that. So for now,maybe if you changed the title of your feeling, you won't feel so bad. Call it adaptation! All will work out. Best wishes and best of health to you! and lots of good rest, too!

  2. Thank you. I am definitely feeling better after my 'day off' and think I will be able to go back tomorrow. But it is definitely hard to give myself a break!